TFAN, Part 26

Title: The Fight About Nothing
Author: aquariuslover
Pairing: KyuWook
Rating: R
Genre: Friendship, Love
Beta: unicornsinger


Summary: This is a completely fictional tale about the thin line between love and friendship, and how easily that line can become blurred.



TFAN Chapters



“Okay there are rules you have to follow,” Minho said, grabbing Kyuhyun before the older boy could open the car door.

“Huh?” Kyuhyun asked, turning a questioning glace toward Minho.

“You cannot bring up the other three no matter what. Jae, Junsu, and Yoochun are off limits completely. Yunho may even try to engage you about them, but for all that is holy, don’t encourage him,” Minho said, with a look of dire warning.

“If Yunho brings them up, then why can’t we talk about them?” Kyuhyun asked, looking out the car window toward the basketball court where Yunho, Changmin and a group of other people were playing basketball. He recognized some of them from his own company, and there were idols from other companies there also, and some people he didn’t recognize.

“Changmin says something always breaks in Yunho after he talks about them. He is cool with us, but Changmin sees the broken side, and to say Changmin doesn’t like it…well, that’s a huge understatement,” Minho told him, looking suddenly sad. “You mustn’t make Yunho Hyung sad.”

“Yeah…Heechul is like that. He will be all happy talking about Hangeng one moment, and…yeah, I get your point; I won’t talk about them. If he brings them up, I will change the subject,” Kyuhyun said, opening the car door and stepping out. Kyuhyun was not out of the car five seconds before he was engulfed in a huge hug by Changmin.

“Where have you been hiding?” Changmin asked Kyuhyun happily after letting him go from the hug.

“I’ve been in the hospital or working like a dog,” Kyuhyun told the younger man, who always seemed years older than him.

“I remember those years of never getting a moment’s rest - can’t say I miss them too much,” Changmin said with a huge smile on his face.

“You seem so much younger,” Kyuhyun couldn’t help but blurt out after looking at Changmin. Kyuhyun wasn’t used to this happy version of Changmin that initiated hugs.

“He’s aging in reverse,” Yunho told him as he walked up and put an arm around Kyuhyun’s shoulders.

“And you’re just aging,” Changmin told Yunho with a smirk.

“It must be a maknae thing, because I’m aging in reverse, too,” Kyuhyun told them, smiling at the two.

“It must be,” Changmin agreed.

“And you both make the people around you age more,” Yunho told them, shaking his head, but his fondness for them both could be heard in his voice.

“Is that what it is?” Kyuhyun asked, looking Yunho up and down and giving him a sad smile. Kyuhyun couldn’t help but think Yunho did indeed seem older…much older.

“Or he’s just getting old,” Changmin added, nudging Yunho gently in the stomach with his elbow.

Yunho let go of Kyuhyun, swatted Changmin on the butt, and grabbed Minho around the waist and started walking off toward the basketball court with him. “Those two are a really bad combination, making fun of poor old me.”

Minho just laughed. “Don’t worry, Hyung, you’re not old.”

“He’s just older,” Changmin said from behind them, putting emphasis on the word older.

“Much older,” Kyuhyun agreed.

“Those two are horribly disrespectful to their elders. One of them at a time is more than enough, but the both of them? Why did we agree to play with the both of them again?” Yunho asked Minho, trying to hide his smile as he walked closer to the court with Minho at his side.

“Eunhyuk made me promise to take Kyuhyun with me the next time I met up with you. He says it’s very important that Kyuhyun talks to you, Hyung,” Minho explained to Yunho, causing Yunho to stop in his tracks and turn back toward Kyuhyun, who had been following behind with Changmin.

Kyuhyun’s face went completely red, causing the other three men to do a double take. A red-faced Kyuhyun was not a common sight to them. “Wha…what? He’s crazy. I don’t know what he’s talking about. I don’t want to talk to you!”

“Err - ” Yunho began, but Kyuhyun instantly interrupted.

“I didn’t mean it that way. I love talking to you, but I don’t need to. It isn’t like I have some huge secret I need to talk to you about, because I don’t. Eunhyuk is crazy, nuts. I’m good. Better than good. I’m fine. No problems here!”

“Okay - ” Yunho started again, his face showing his doubt.

“I am ready to play ball! What about you guys? Let’s go play ball. I love sports. God, how I love sports!” Kyuhyun said, hurrying off toward the basketball court as fast as he could.

Changmin walked up to stand beside Yunho and Minho, all three men looked extremely perplexed. “Eunhyuk said he would totally deny it,” Minho explained as he watched Kyuhyun start embracing random people on the basketball court.

“Did he say what we needed to talk about?”

“Not really. He wouldn’t give me any details. We were filming for Dream Team, and he just kept saying it was very important for the future of Super Junior that he talk to you.”

“Seriously, he said that? For the future of Super Junior? Why is that Yunho’s problem, exactly?” Changmin demanded, not caring that his annoyance was showing.

“Changmin, down, boy. He just wanted him to talk to me. If I can help, I will.”

“Of course you will. It isn’t like you have anything else to do. It isn’t like you don’t have enough to deal with. You aren’t busy at all,” Changmin bit out his words angrily.

“Changmin - ” Yunho warned.

“Don’t Changmin me. Seriously, the future of Super Junior? Do you really need that added stress?”

“He was probably exaggerating; he does that,” Minho said, trying to calm Changmin.

“Very true. He probably just wants me to talk to Kyuhyun. It’s not a big deal. We help friends,” Yunho said, patting Changmin on the back.

“Well…I suppose,” Changmin said, shrugging Yunho off as he walked off to join Kyuhyun and the others on the basketball court.


*****************

“I hate sports. You just don’t have any idea how much I hate them. I hated them before my accident, but since then, I hate them even more. I didn’t even think it was possible for me to hate them more, but I totally do,” Kyuhyun whined as he sat down in the grass next to Go Ara, completely drenched in sweat.

“Are you hurting?” Go Ara asked him as he fell back into the grass.

“No,” Kyuhyun said, sitting back up immediately to face her. “Do you see all this sweat? I think I have a sweating problem. Nobody else out there playing looks like they jumped in the Han River.”

“My mother says it’s healthy to sweat,” she told him smiling at his hysterics.

“It can’t be healthy…because I don’t do healthy. I am the opposite of healthy. It’s not that I aim to be unhealthy. I actually don’t like being sick. I have spent enough time in a hospital to last me several lifetimes,” Kyuhyun explained to Go Ara; he felt completely at ease around her. It was the worse kept secret in all of K-pop that she was dating Yunho.

“I’m sorry,” she told him, but she couldn’t help but grin at his complaining. The girl sitting beside her quietly chuckled.

“Did I tell you I hate sports? I hate them. I have had a broken hip before…I had to learn how to walk again. That totally sucked. You have no idea how many times I fell on my ass. I just don’t think I should have to play sports, and that includes dancing! I will admit that I was totally excited about being in the dancing line at first…but now after a few performances, I think it was mistake. Sungmin should in the dancing line…he’s a way better dancer. I am singer, and I should just focus on singing.”

“And what a lovely voice you have,” she confirmed for him, with eyes were full of amusement at the way he rambling on and on.

“I know, right?” Kyuhyun told her, nodding his head in agreement. “I like StarCraft, too.”

“I’ve never played,” she admitted, much to his shock, but her eyes were on the basketball court now and not him.

“Oh, you should. It’s like my third favorite thing to do. It’s amazing. I am really good at it.”

“I bet you are.”

“Well it may sound like bragging, but it’s the truth. Although there are some people that just blow me away. They are genius at it. I am trying to befriend them all and learn all their secrets,” Kyuhyun admitted as he ran his hands though his soaking wet hair.

“Uh-huh,” she mumbled, but her eyes were focused on someone else.

Kyuhyun didn’t seem to care as he fell back down in the grass. “Although I should really focus on singing more…I can’t believe that some people think that Yesung - ” Kyuhyun stopped suddenly and sat back up when he noticed Yunho standing over him. Yunho was talking to Go Ara in Japanese, and Kyuhyun couldn’t help but notice the look of complete and utter adoration she gave him.

Kyuhyun couldn’t understand their Japanese and was about to ask for a translator when Go Ara jumped up and pulled her friend up with her. Go Ara turned to Kyuhyun, still smiling. “Bye for now, Kyuhyun.”

“Bye,” Kyuhyun told her as he swallowed deeply in dread as she walked away. Kyuhyun eyes looked up at Yunho, who was looking down at him, smiling warmly.

“Let’s walk and talk,” Yunho told Kyuhyun as he reached down a hand to help the younger man up.

“We really don’t have to,” Kyuhyun said as he let the older, stronger man pull him to his feet.

“I think we probably should.”

“But it isn’t necessary. Eunhyuk is crazy, I tell you,” Kyuhyun told Yunho as he followed the man, who walked farther away from the basketball court and the others so they would not be overheard.

“No, he isn’t. I can’t even remember the last time he asked anything of me, so this must be important,” Yunho said as he headed for a tree a few feet away with a bench under it.

Kyuhyun could feel panic setting in; he grasped for anything to stall Yunho. “Go Ara is really nice. When she looks at you, you can tell she already has your future babies named.”

Yunho who had already reached the tree, turned to Kyuhyun, chuckling. “Nice try. Sit,” Yunho told him, pointing to the bench.

“So, how many kids do you think you’ll have?” Kyuhyun said not sitting down; instead, he was fighting the urge to flee.

Yunho sighed and took Kyuhyun by the shoulders and sat him down on the bench. “You do realize, I practically raised Changmin, so I am used to these stall tactics.”

“Hyung, this isn’t anything you want to know. Eunhyuk wishes like mad he didn’t know it. Does he hate you? Maybe that’s why he wants you to know? Do you think he hates you? Why would he hate you?”

Yunho sighed again. “Eunhyuk doesn’t hate me. Stop the games, and tell me already.”

“I can’t. It isn’t something I should ever share with anyone….ever,” Kyuhyun admitted honestly, clutching the bench underneath him so hard his hands hurt.

“Then, why would Eunhyuk want you to tell me?”

“He’s afraid I will do something stupid. I won’t. I promise. Please, just let it go.”

“Who knows?” Yunho asked, truly curious now that he could see the distress all over Kyuhyun was for real.

“Just me, the other person, and Eunhyuk…because we thought he was sleeping. If he wasn’t a sneaky little eavesdropper, then he wouldn’t know any of this.” Kyuhyun explained, clutching the bench.

“Why me and not Leeteuk?”

“Well, Leeteuk would probably have a stroke and die if he found out. I honestly don’t know why he would want to burden you with this.”

“And who’s the other person?” Yunho asked, gently watching the younger man calm slightly.

“That would be the person I love…am in love with,” Kyuhyun said, nervously squeezing his eyes shut.

“You shouldn’t love this person?” Yunho asked as a hint of sadness slipped into his voice.

Kyuhyun’s eyes snapped open, and he looked up at Yunho. “I should love him. It’s the most natural thing in the world to love him. It’s just to some, it’s the most unnatural thing in the world for me to be in love with him.”

“Him…another member?” Yunho asked, growing paler.

“Yes,” Kyuhyun confirmed; he worried as the blood seemed to leave the other man’s body. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, I am just a little - ” Yunho answered him as he took a seat on the bench next to Kyuhyun.

“Shocked? Angry? Nauseated? Disgusted?”

“No, no. None of those things. I am just sad for you. Just so sad for you,” Yunho said, grabbing Kyuhyun’s hand and looking him in the eye.

“Sad for me?”

“Yes, because this isn’t a light decision or an easy road.”

“It isn’t a decision at all. I never decided this. I think I was in denial for years, but one night he got drunk and kissed me, and then everything started to become clear from that moment on,” Kyuhyun explained, realizing he was now clutching Yunho’s hand tightly instead of the bench.

“I understand.”

“Do you?” Kyuhyun asked amazed. “Eunhyuk was right to tell you. I thought he was insane. I never imagined that you would have this great understanding of gayness.”

Yunho’s eyes twinkled. “I wouldn’t word it exactly like that. Are you saying that you are gay?”

“No, I am more like one-person-oriented….is that possible?”

Yunho smiled sadly at him. “I think so - ”

“It has to be, because I have never, like, found another man attractive - well, except my inappropriate dream about…nevermind that,” Kyuhyun stopped as Minho’s warning played in his mind.

“So, are you going to say who you’re in love with, or do you want me to guess?” Yunho asked him, slightly amused as if he could read the other man’s mind.

“I think you should guess. I want to see how obvious it is to a person that knows that I have feelings for one of my members.”

Yunho mashed his lips together and seemed to be giving it great thought and said, “Isn’t Sungmin the one you are paired with the most?”

“The fans wish. It’s never the pairing that they want; that’s way too obvious,” Kyuhyun said, chuckling nervously.

“No, never.” Yunho agreed with a smirk.

“Sungmin isn’t gay or one person oriented…he’s girl crazy. He better get it out of his system before he marries my sister, though,” Kyuhyun explained feeling totally comfortable with Yunho now.

“I am not even going to ask. Let’s see - ” Yunho said, still trying to think of the member that Kyuhyun was in love with. “Ryeowook.” The blush that played across Kyuhyun’s face let Yunho know he had guessed right.

“Yeah…” Kyuhyun confirmed, still blushing. “He is going all out to put an end to it before it even starts, though,” Kyuhyun confessed, his face taking on look of sadness.

“You two haven’t done…done anything have you?” Yunho asked carefully.

Kyuhyun blushed even more now. “Not really. Nothing sexual at all, unless you count kissing.”

“I don’t,” Yunho told him, watching Kyuhyun very closely.

“Although our kissing is really great…like, so wonderful. I could kiss him all day long,” Kyuhyun said with a huge grin on his face as the sadness vanished.

“So, Ryeowook got drunk and kissed you…and now you think you’re in love with him?”

“No, I know I am in love with him. I hit him the first time he kissed me, though.”

“That’s understandable - I suppose since you were shocked. So how does hitting him for kissing you, turn into you wanting to kiss him all day long?”

“Well, at first it scared me. I don’t want to be gay; no sane person would.”

“Agreed.”

“So, we were, like, really weird for weeks with each other…then, I got sick. I always get sick when we fight. It’s hugely embarrassing, but it’s so true. I tried to deny it when my mom pointed it out to me, but I can’t now.”

“Your mom knows?” Yunho asked surprised.

“No, not that I love him…well, she knows I love him. She doesn’t know I am in love with him. Nobody knows that but you, Ryeowook, and Eunhyuk…well, and my crazy sister, although I have never confirmed it for her. She is such a psycho, but she knew - I think she knew even before we knew. She used to irritate me to no end - ”

“Kyuhyun, you better get to the point, because Minho and Go Ara are not going to be able to keep Changmin away for long,” Yunho said, eyeing the basketball court and his much beloved maknae that was shooting worried glances his way.

“Right. I got sick was in the hospital. Sungmin tricked us into making peace. I was so relieved, because I missed him so much. He made all these rules like he could never drink around me, we couldn’t sleep in the same bed, and we could never play at fan service, but they didn’t work. I started thinking too much about why am I so jealous of anybody who is close to him? Why do I only want his hands on me?”

Kyuhyun stopped and looked at Yunho for any signs that he was feeling uncomfortable, but Yunho only gave him an encouraging nod. “Before I knew it, I wanted to kiss him again. He said absolutely not, but in a weak moment, I convinced him. I told him that if we kissed again, and I felt nothing, then I would never bother him again.”

“But it wasn’t nothing,” Yunho said knowingly.

“No, it was…it was everything. I just don’t have words for what it was. It wasn’t enough, though. I have wanted to go further ever since, but he absolutely will not allow it. He is scared.”

“He’s right to be scared, and he’s wise to not have let it go any further,” Yunho told Kyuhyun gently.

Kyuhyun dropped Yunho’s hand suddenly, unprepared for that response. “I thought you understood?”

“I do understand. I understand what you want, but I also know the society we live in. You would be an outcast if the wrong person found out.”

“Nobody is going to find out. I don’t display my feelings,” Kyuhyun argued.

“You think you don’t. There are people in this world that obsess only about you. You are their world. They know when you are sad, happy, or tired. There are normal fans, and then there are fans that make their whole life about you. And even if those fans decided to protect you, then someday somebody else would find out who wouldn’t. Three people already know, and it just takes one person slipping up,” Yunho tried to explain to Kyuhyun.

“This is why I didn’t want to tell you!” Kyuhyun exclaimed.

“But you did. I won’t ever tell a living soul, I swear. Changmin will drive me insane, but I will never tell him. I would never tell...this is the secret of your life.”

“Secret of my life?” Kyuhyun said fearfully as the words hit to close to home.

“Yes, it will be your greatest joy, or it will be your ruin,” Yunho told him gravely, his face aging before Kyuhyun’s eyes.

“It will be my greatest joy, because Ryeowook would never hurt me. I would never hurt him,” Kyuhyun explained, grabbing Yunho’s hand again.

Yunho let out a laugh of such bitterness that Kyuhyun immediately dropped his hand again. “How I remember this. You love each other so much. You would never hurt each other. Your love is forever. Nothing could ever break your bond,” Yunho said, laughing. “Believe me even the greatest loves end. Nobody knows better than me how somebody can love you more than anything today and totally hate you tomorrow.”

“Hyung,” Kyuhyun said with his eyes opened wide as he so clearly felt the other man’s pain.

“The opposite of love isn’t like or ambivalence…it’s hate. True love doesn’t fade away…it is destroyed in fire.”

“Ryeowook would never hurt me,” Kyuhyun told Yunho.

“What about you? Would you hurt him? Of course you say you won’t, but you can’t possibly know what the future holds. It might be you that does the hurting, have you considered that? The future makes many a man a liar,” Yunho said with a far-off look in his eyes that screamed of regret.

“Did you hurt somebody, Hyung?” Kyuhyun asked, suddenly moving closer to the other man.

“More people than I could ever name. I shall always regret hurting them, but I also made other people proud. Life isn’t simple Kyuhyun, it is hard…it’s so very hard. Sometimes there is not a right choice; sometimes you just have to make the choice that causes the least harm, but in the end, somebody always gets hurt.”

“You are saying exactly what Eunhyuk and Ryeowook have been preaching all along - that we can’t be together. All I ever hear is no,” Kyuhyun said, standing up, hating the reality of the situation.

Yunho grabbed Kyuhyun and pulled him back on the bench with him. “No, I am not saying that. There are only two choices you can make, but before you make them, you have to know that love doesn’t last forever, and the people we love the most are the ones we end up hurting the most.”

“I don’t understand you.”

“Don’t assume you will always be in love with Ryeowook, and don’t assume he will always be in love with you. You are very much like my Changmin, and I know that the thrill of having what you can’t have must play into this.”

“It doesn’t! I swear it doesn’t,” Kyuhyun yelled, standing up, vehemently denying the older man’s words.

“Sit back down, and listen to me,” Yunho said, pulling Kyuhyun back down as he eyed the basketball court and noticed Go Ara and Minho doing their best to distract Changmin, but he had heard the yelling, and Yunho knew he would soon be upon them.

“Ask yourself this, if you are together, and then it suddenly all falls apart, how will you handle it? If he doesn’t want to be with you anymore, or if you can’t be with him for some unknown reason…how will you continue to work with each other? Can it be done? Would you leave Super Junior? Would he?”

“No…I mean I don’t think so. I can’t know for certain,” Kyuhyun admitted honestly, but at the same time tried to push such unhappy thoughts from his mind.

“That’s the right answer. You can’t know. Nobody knows for certain what the future holds.”

“Then, what are my two choices?”

“I am sure there are more choices out there…I know there are much wiser people than me, but this is how I see it. Your life is going to be about lying from now on. Your first choice is that you follow Ryeowook’s lead and deny it. Never get together. Pretend like it never happened. This is a lie, because you will always wonder. It might even drive you insane, because you will always wonder what it could have been like…if you would have been happy. Nobody has to get hurt other then you and Ryeowook if you take this road. Your family will never know, the group will never know, and you won’t have to worry about a secret coming out that could destroy everything you love.”

Kyuhyun frowned at the first choice and asked, “And the second?”

“You act on your feelings. You become a couple, but you have to be on guard every second of your life from that moment on. Once you have sex with Ryeowook, you can never take it back. All this I’m not gay, I’m just one-person-oriented will not matter from that moment on; in everybody else’s eyes, you are gay.”

“I think I will pick that choice. I have no problem lying to be happy,” Kyuhyun explained, a smile forming on his face.

Yunho chuckled at his ignorance. “If only it were that easy; if only.”

“I know it won’t be easy. I am prepared, and it will be worth it.”

“It will be easy at first. At first, it will be the easiest thing in the world. There is a reason there is so much fascination surrounding forbidden love…it’s delicious in the beginning. You being together against the world will make your bond stronger, but sadly, days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, and months turn into years…and secrets become a burden over time. When you never show interest in a girl, never date, never take a wife, don’t think people won’t start asking why, especially your family. The excuse of ‘I’m too busy’ only buys you so much time.”

“I will just pretend to date. I am going to do that tomorrow. I can make a girl think I’m interested,” Kyuhyun reasoned, but he couldn’t help but begin to feel uneasy with the second choice now.

“Oh, so you want to pretend to date? Take her out? Make people think you are lovers?”

“Yes, I can do that.”

“Now, how are you going to feel when Ryeowook does that? When he is arm in arm with a girl and can be openly affectionate…with somebody who isn’t you, because it can never be you?” Yunho asked, already knowing the answer.

“I won’t like it at all. I hate it already,” Kyuhyun admitted frowning. “But if it’s the price I have to pay for us being together, then I will have to deal with it….as long as it isn’t that bitch, Dolly, or that Luna thing.”

“Jealously isn’t pretty, and it isn’t logical… so I don’t see you dealing,” Yunho replied, raising an eyebrow at the younger man.

Kyuhyun couldn’t help but grin. “I didn’t say I would be happy…I just said I would have to deal.”

“How am I not going to worry about you?” Yunho asked, shaking his head.

“Can I ask you something?” Kyuhyun blurted out quickly as he saw Changmin break free of Minho’s grasp, only to be slowed down by Go Ara, who insisted on fixing his hair.

“How do you know so much? Did it happen in DBSK? Is this how you know so much? Why Eunhyuk insisted I talk to you... I know it wasn’t Changmin, and you are practically married to Go Ara already, so who was it? Was it Jae and Yoochun? They had that whole weird matching tattoo thing,” Kyuhyun asked, ignoring Minho’s warnings as curiosity got the better of him.

Yunho’s face went blank. “No comment.”

“Okay, I totally get why you can’t tell me. Can you tell me what choice they picked at least?”

“Kyuhyun, I am not confirming or denying anything for you. I know lots of people...lots of people. Don’t assume you know anything,” Yunho told him, his eyes narrowing in warning.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. Of course you won’t tell, even though they…….I wasn’t supposed to mention them,” Kyuhyun said, apologizing to the man beside him, who was suddenly extremely tense, more so then he had been during the whole previous conversation.

“Aww, Changmin’s rules,” Yunho said with a small, bitter smile.

“Yeah, Minho warned me. I just got excited, because if it was them…they must still be together, and that gives me hope,” Kyuhyun tried to explain as he saw Changmin approaching them quickly.

“Don’t take any hope from anything I’ve told you. I have no hope to give you. You think everything over, and then you think it over again. Don’t ignore Ryeowook’s fears. Respect his fear; it could save you both a lot of heartache,” Yunho said, getting up off the bench and walking toward Changmin.

“What does that mean?” Kyuhyun couldn’t help but wonder as he watched Yunho walk up to Changmin.

“What are you two talking about?” Changmin demanded to know as he eyed Yunho closely and noticed the tension in the older man.

“Kyuhyun’s screwed up love life. It’s almost as pitiful as yours.”

“I don’t believe you,” Changmin informed Yunho as he glared at Kyuhyun, who was still sitting on the bench looking pitiful.

“Don’t deny it; your love life is a mess, too, Changmin. Stalking Boa won’t make her fall in love with you,” Yunho said, teasing his maknae who glowered back at him.

“So not funny, Hyung!” Changmin said, chastising Yunho.

“I’m terribly sorry, but I swear on your love of food that we were talking about Kyuhyun’s messed up love life.”

“We really were. My love life is a total mess,” Kyuhyun confirmed for Changmin as he walked up to the other men.

“Do you think I’m an idiot? Why would Eunhyuk insist he talk to you about his love life?” Changmin asked, very annoyed.

“They were really tired of hearing about it. Like really, really tired of hearing about it. I tend to ramble…a lot,” Kyuhyun explained as he put an arm around Changmin.

“I think Eunhyuk might hate me. I mean how long did I have to sit there and listen to that? I mean, what did I ever do to deserve that?” Yunho asked, grinning.

“I told you he must hate you,” Kyuhyun agreed, smiling at Yunho.

“Why would he hate you? What have you ever done to him?” Changmin asked, his protective nature taking over.

“Well, maybe he’s jealous of my looks. I’m very good looking, I’ve been told,” Yunho said, laughing as he started walking off in front of them.

“That must be it!” Kyuhyun said, smiling at Changmin, who was frowning now as they both followed Yunho.

“You are not that good looking. If anybody is going to be hated for being too good looking, it would be me,” Changmin informed them both.

“He’s better natured than you, though, so he’s less likely to retaliate,” Kyuhyun explained with a smug smile, and his arm still around the other man.

“Nice try, but I don’t believe for one second that this was about your love life. Good job at trying to distract me, though,” Changmin said, glaring at Kyuhyun.

Kyuhyun just smiled back at him. “We totally were. Let me tell you all about it. There is an older model that Zhou Mi knows with a very talented tongue - ”

“I can’t listen to this again,” Yunho said, covering his ears and hurrying up to join Go Ara and the rest of his friends. Changmin just chewed on the left side of his mouth and stared suspiciously at Kyuhyun, but didn’t interrupt as Kyuhyun continued telling his story.
  • Current Music: Viva la Vida
Oh no, bad news :( Good thing Kyuhyun is rebellious and known for not listening to his hyungs. I'd cut a bitch if he listens to Yunho who happens to be really suspicious about his side of the story >__> It's good to know that Kyu is honest enough with himself to take the risk and go for what he thinks is right :) Can't wait for him to put his plan in action... and punch Luna in the face, if necessary lol.

Lol, somehow, Changmin owns this whole chapter. I love him <3 Lol.

I'm demanding. Yes, I am. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER! :D :D :D
"cut a bitch" I love that! You never fail to entertain!

I love Changmin too, so much.

Thanks for reading and commenting!
“It will be easy at first. At first it will be the easiest thing in the world. There is a reason there is so much fascination surrounding forbidden love…it’s delicious in the beginning. You being together against the world will make your bond stronger, but sadly days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, and months turn into years…and secrets become a burden over time. " -> I almost have tears in my eyes. It's so true it hurts, life isn't at all easy to live. Hyuk is right to ask Yunho to talk to Kyu, such an understanding hyung :)
Kyu now has to make a choice. Just hope that he'll make the right one, and both of them will be happy. *pray for them*
Excellent chapter, I'm deeply touched :) Waiting for the next to come soon :) Happy writing!
You know I am a sucker for quotes so I really loved your comment! I agree life isn't easy, it can be downright hard at times.

I am glad you liked Yunho.

Thanks so much for commenting and reading!
Are you magnaesontop from youtube??? You seem to word things differently but since you have the same name I thought I would ask. I love that site, a must for all KyuWook fans.

I am so touched when people tell me how real it seems, but in truth a million fans know way more then me...I just fake it. LOL

The book publisher comment is so sweet. Thanks so much for commenting and reading!

PS: I'm old enough to know better! Ha!
I love long chapters with long conversations in which the characters just talk it out. Because words really are the essence of stories. It's easy to imagine a conversation in a certain plotline play out in your mind, but it's not easy to convey it smoothly and engagingly like you did. =)

The simplest yet my favourite sentences in this chapter - “I should love him. It’s the most natural thing in the world to love him. It’s just to some it’s the most unnatural thing in the world for me to be in love with him.”

Great chapter! =)
I love conversations too!

My love for them really won out in this part too. I am glad you enjoyed it. I am like anti-description in both reading and writing...and sometimes it's a good thing and sometimes it's a very bad thing.

Thanks for reading and commenting!
owhhh...what will happen to kyuwook???
which choice that kyu will choose...
although i want second choice but will they be happy to pretend all the time...
so much conflict....
i am so curious about yunho/dbsk's story in this series... i might have an idea, but then again i might be wrong...

i am so feeling for kyuhyun... and i can't help but be really really really curious as to how things will pick up from here...

and again... the fast update! definitely made my day!

can't wait for the next chapter!
I tried to leave the Yunho/DBSK part vague, but kinda obvious at the same time, except it probably isn't....because what I just wrote doesn't even make sense. LOL

Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
Poor Luna...how I torture her. I don't dislike her at all, she seems like such a happily adjusted girl...it's that Kyuhyun's a crazy jealous psycho.

Awe you are too kind.:) Thanks for reading and commenting!
LOL So smooth Kyu so very smooth...
I am really glad that Eunhyuk made Kyuhyun go and talk to Yunho. It was a very good idea in the end.
Now all I am hoping is for Wookie and Kyu to actually get together like a (secret) couple!!!
AAAHHHHH!!! I am so excited for the next chapters now!! (there must be quite a ways to go I am guessing.)
I am so glad that people are liking this part I was prepared for the opposite. Very happy.:)

Actually there are only six parts left and then it's done.

Thank so much for reading and commenting!
I've been following this series from the beginning and I don't think I've ever left a comment before, but I just want to say I really really love this series. Somehow it's very realistic and a little heart-breaking. I hope you continue to write forever. *__*
Thank you very much for commenting now! I hope I always enjoy writing as much as I have the last three months.

Thanks so much for reading!
*lets out a huge sigh~* and another*
Kyuhyun....Ryeowook....why am I feeling as if they won't ever be together??
I wanted Yunho to go and tell Kyuhyun to go for it, love Ryeowook with all that's in you..
But logically he can't. You opened my eyes on how fans can be on a higher level of obsess.
I feel sad-_-" this fic just makes my feelings go qwertyuiop[];',./ love it love it♥♥
Fans shouldn't be like that. Seriously. If they love/like their idols so much then let them live their lives for PETE'S SAKE!! this is why in every single thing that they do are monitored. Little mistakes turns into huge issues. *sigh...again*

Fangirling starts here:
OHFORTHELOVEOFKYUWOOK!! Really Yunho, Changmin, and Minho all in one fic?? Are you planning to kill me with their LONG LONG legs?? :Q____________________
I just imagine them in these basketball shorts and when they're walking or just standing there, those leg muscles tensing in the sun.. and OMFG...I LOVE YOU♥
I want some~T.T
Can't wait for more...although im starting to get really anxious since its only a few chapters left before you end it:( but i really want to know the ending so badly~~
This chapter was amaaaazing! I love the nice long meaningful chats. I still say him and Wookie need to sit down and talk it out too! Eunhyuk picked a good person to talk to though! I felt it all. <3

Still on Kyu's side. Don't give up hope Kyu!

Can't wait to know what happens next! (as usual)

Ilu<333
Kyu needs you on his side because he is totally outnumbered in the story!

I am glad you liked the long chat...I gave into my urge!

Thanks bunches for reading and commenting!
"Are you planning to kill me with their LONG LONG legs?" <-- this comment just about killed me. XD

anyway. as always you've set a higher standard to writing your own fics. wait. did that make sense? that prolly was grammatically wrong. XD

as the story progresses, it only gets better and better, and so i wonder how ever are you going to raise the bar now that the last few chapters are released. i now understand why some people would hate it like you said they would. yunho didn't encourage kyu (and changmin had to be so suspicious, too), and even though kyu had sworn never to hurt ryeowook (and vise versa), the reality would always hit everybody like a ton of bricks, and everything just becomes muddled all over again. what i am saying is, we will never know if kyu and ryeowook are ever going to be together in the end. it's already chapter 26, and: ryeowook still resists,
kyu still keeps on tugging,
eunhyuk is still apprehensive,
heechul is now suspicious along with changmin, a
nd yunho just learned about the secret.

it's sweet (and may i add, touching) that they have this conversation. when the worst of the situations comes, yunho's words will be one of the very things that kyu will turn to. i think i just got overly emotional. secrets like this are poison. i would know. i was there. i swear i could have just chosen to run away when i had the chance, but i had to be so damn selfish (and kyu just has the same tendency tsk tsk). and so i would never know if there is hope for kyu and ryeowook anymore.

haha! one person oriented. clever term. I SO LOVE YOU. i wake up, dreading about the amount of work i should do in just a few hours, and reading this is a more than a treat for me. i am glad that more and more people are coming out and professing their love for this fic, because this deserves more audience and appreciation.

thanks for the update! :)
I know she killed me too with her long legs comment! Loved it.

Grammar who cares, blah I hate it. I liked math in school not crazy English Grammar that has no logic.

I am sure some hated it but they are being kind to me. Changmin is very suspicious but it's founded in his protectiveness of Yunho.

It really will all come down to the ending.

I have seen this kinda of thing go down before too and even in America(where some of us are very open minded) it can be ugly. I can only imagine what it would be like there.

Thanks, I always love your comments and your support. So for the sake of your work I will wait till the weekend to update again.

If I have a crack inspired part, it's that one.

haha I sense YunJae...
*sighs* poor Kyuwook. Don't worry~ Most fans would greatly appreciate it if you did go gay together xD
I miss Yunjae...sniff.

I don't think the fans would enjoy it in Korea, I think they might be tarred and feathered. KyuWook fans would love it though! We would all want to throw them a party!

Thanks bunches for reading and commenting!
Omg! I feel this fic is coming to a close in about 10-20 chapters! It's a really awesome story and I hope kyu chooses wook instead of protecting himself. I mean it's better to have the time of your life for a while than wondered what could have happened if he chose wook I mean seriously I'd choose love over life any day. I mean it's not like they would burn them at the stake people would just make a huge fuss over it and then accept it soon or later

I love you for writing this and I hope you continue with it. <3
“Seriously he said that? For the future of Super Junior? Why is that Yunho’s problem exactly?”
Not only is this my favorite line of the story but it's so Changmin, I'm completely serious.

Before I even address the Yunho and Kyuhyun talk I just have to add that I absolutely adore the fact that Changmin was being "distracted" and the moments such as... he eyed the basketball court and noticed Go Area and Minho doing their best to distract Changmin but he had heard the yelling and Yunho knew he would soon be upon them.as he saw Changmin break free of Minho’s grasp, only to be slowed down by Go Ara who insisted on fixing his hair... made me so happy. I don't know if it was the idea of Changmin being so protective but I completely loved it. I LOVED IT!

“I am ready to play ball! What about you guys? Let’s go play ball. I love sports. God, how I love sports!” Kyuhyun said hurrying off toward the basketball court as fast as he could. This is my second favorite line because Kyuhyun is hilarious. He's such a baby. Then this golden piece is equally hilarious: “I hate sports. You just don’t have any idea how much I hate them. I hated them before my accident, but since then I hate them even more. I didn’t even think it was possible for me to hate them more, but I totally do.” Kyuhyun whined as he sat down in the grass next to Go Ara completely drenched in sweat. I really think you have knack for writing humor.

Ok now, Yunho and Kyhyun. It's pretty clear that Kyuhyun really does love Ryeowook and really believes that he would do everything he could to protect the love between them, whether that means lying to everyone and pretending he's someone different and dating people so that no one knows. I think he really could do that but I'm thinking that Ryeowook couldn't and no, if Kyuhyun gets jealous and green-eyed when the members take Ryeowook's attention from him, it will be 10x worse if it's someone who's being physical and he doesn't trust, but it's amusing that he thinks he can handle that.

I think Yunho was very sage and wise in his conversation with Kyuhyun, clearly he's speaking from experience, you can't fool me lady, I know who you're talking about because there is no one else you'd willingly put together. I love that he didn't paint a bright and pretty picture for Kyuhyun because the situation isn't bright and pretty but I can kind of see Kyuhyun feeling like things will be different because people in love always think they're situation is different. I can't wait to see what happens.

I really enjoyed it... and have you completed the story and are posting whenever you want!? If so you better be updating every day! I want to know what happens lady!
Everyday!!!!

I can’t update it everyday. I would be distracted at work. Instead of saving lives I would be on my iphone reading comments. Very, VERY bad idea.

Of course I wanted to show Changmin as protective…I love protective Changmin. The Homin relationship is one of my all time favorites due to the complexity of their roles. One minute Yunho is the father, the next is he is the silly child……love them always.

It’s so easy to make Kyuhyun funny. I have to fight to not make him funny all the time. I love his sarcasm too much.

I think Yunho was very sage and wise in his conversation with Kyuhyun, clearly he's speaking from experience, you can't fool me lady, I know who you're talking about because there is no one else you'd willingly put together. Ha! You think you know me so well! I could…make another pairing. I could, if I didn’t have to go into details…or if I was intoxicated at the time.

Thanks for reading, dear friend!
D: sadness
update soon
but D: GET TOGETHER WITH HIM AND IGNORE EVERYONE ELSE T^T
AquariusKyu, I love your comments.

You have so much speculation and I would love to comment, but I made that rule about not spoiling.:)

Fans are human, and humans change their minds…we are influenced by so many things. As fans we have this image of the idol, of what we want them to be…and when they break from that image it can be disastrous. I myself have been a victim of this and it took me a year of struggling to find my peace, but the love is often diminished in the end.

I would never turn on an idol for being gay though, especially if they were pretty boys that I wanted together…I would offer to throw them party or a wedding! There are many fans in the DBSK, SHINee, and SJ that would probably lose their mind and become psychotic.

Kyuhyun is my pet. I love watching him and I love that other fans have noticed how jealous he can be. I am not just talking about greedy Kyuhyun from Intimate Note either; his most obviously jealous moments were from SJ-M activities.

Thanks always for reading and your lovely feedback!
Yay All the Magnae ==> <3 <3 :D

This story just keeps me sitting with my finger on the refresh button hoping the next chapter will roll in... Its so good and could even fit in with reality which is brilliant! :)
Minho totally counts as a Magnae! He's too cute, he has to be one. Ryeowook and Minho can both be eternal magnae!

Thanks for reading and commenting!
Hey o/ I'm accompaning this since beggining, but i never comment because i'm good reading english, but talking i'm not confident. But i can't resist, i need to tell you how much i love this and i come here everyday (Even knowing that don't have any update) and sometimes i read the same chapter ten or more times.
You made this so real, it's so cool to read this. I don't think that couples are real, but KyuWook is different, i think they are so fascinanting and the fact that you use reality in your fic just make me go oh-so-crazy with my oh-so-crazy mind LOL I was about to delete my LJ account but i will make this only when you finish this fanfic, and you can really wait my fail comments with my poor english. This is one of my two favorite fics, from the bottom of my heart.

I like how you make things difficult for them, and i just can't hate your Eunnie, he want the best for everyone. I'm curious and anxious for next updates *--* I'm so sorry for the long comment, i think you didn't understood a big part of him LOL I can't hide my love for this anymore ♥

Okke, talking too much x) i will stop taking your time for now. hwaiting, ~
Don't you dare apologize for your comment! I love it and you just comment all you want!

Most people can only speak one language so I am in awe all you wonderful people who can speak and write in both.

I am glad you don't hate Eunhyuk, because he really is doing that he thinks is best for everyone.

Thanks so MUCH for commenting and reading!
Awe, don't cry.:(

I love it when people let me know what they liked best.

Thank you so much for reading and commenting!
Yay, another update! Wow, this chapter was kind of terrifying, but beautiful. I love how protective Changmin is of Yunho with the “rule“ about not talking about the other DBSK members… and how Kyu can relate to it from his experience with his own band member:
“Yeah, Heechul is like that. He will be all happy talking about Hangeng one moment and… yeah, I get your point I won’t talk about them.” (Gah, Heechul being all depressed over Hangeng and the others makes me sad. I love Hanchul and all, but it’s pathetic that some of the crazier Hanchul fans sent both Heechul and Hangeng nasty messages for abandoning each other’s love. Give me a break. As if life’s not hard enough without crazy fans).

Hehe, Kyuhyun and Changmin, the two snark brothers. Good thing for their leaders that they didn’t end up in the same group, hahaha. Kyu’s denial is so funny “I love sports. God, how I love sports!”

It’s so cute how Yunho slowly helps Kyu open up about his feelings for Ryeowook… and how well Yunho truly understands KyuWook’s situation. Kyu is so adorable and so naïve (I hate saying that he’s naïve, but it’s true) about his love for Wookie. “One person-oriented…” You’re brilliant, I agree! Oh, and in the midst of all of the seriousness, the line ‘“well except my inappropriate dream about… never mind that.” Kyu stopped as Minho’s warning played in his mind.’ made me laugh out loud. Oh, Kyu, everyone knows that dreams about Jaejoong don’t count =P

Yunho made a really good point (well, a lot of them) about obsessed fans being able to find out everything about their idols. If they go with option 2, eventually (and it probably won’t take *that* long… maybe a year, tops), someone will find out who won’t be willing to keep their secret for them. If Yunho could guess, fans who make it a point to know everything about Kyu and Wook will find out, too. I hope Kyu *partially* takes Yunho’s words to heart… at least enough understand better where Wookie’s coming from. I don’t want Kyu to lose that “essence of maknae” courage/hope/optimism/sense of being invincible, but I do want him to be at least somewhat protected from a too sudden realization of how the world really works. Wookie seems to be a bit more knowledgeable about the way the world works, but he’s still pretty naïve about this sort of thing, too.

I’m curious about DBSK, too, but I’m glad Yunho didn’t tell Kyu anything. Argh, *shakes fist* you and your brilliant writing… you’ve made me get all emotionally invested in these characters! >:o Lol =D I can’t believe there are just 6 more chapters left. I really have no idea what’s going to happen. I was trying to think of a possible way things could work out… now, if they could only find two girl celebs who are in love who they are close to, to act as married couples with them… lol, just kidding. Part of why I love this story is because it’s infused with a good dose of reality… I think I’d be a little disappointed if you suddenly pulled a fairy tale and gave KyuWook and Super Junior a happily ever after (with SM head honchos and fans throwing rose petals at their public wedding and Siwon presiding =P ) I know you won't do that, though. In spite of all that they're up against, hoping the best for KyuWook <3

Just curious, is there anywhere in Korea that ficKyuWook could move to that might be a bit more accepting? Somewhere like San Francisco? Urgh, but I still think their families (and friends/groupmates) will be one of the hardest parts, if not the hardest part. Man, you were so good at painting the "ripple effect" picture in this chapter... all the actions we take create ripples that reach out and affect other people.
I freaking LOVE unicorns!

Fans are insane. INSANE. I say that as a crazy a fan.:)

Poor HanChul, well mostly Heechul…I always sympathize more with the one left behind. It feeds into my angst loving tendencies. Heechul was so distraught when Hangeng left, I mean he practically broadcast it. Those fans make me ill.

Can you imagine Changmin and Kyuhyun in the same team? If they had both ended up in DBSK…JYJ would have left years ago. Yunho would be completely gray headed by now.

Kyuhyun is extremely bright, but he is very naïve. He wants what he wants and he see’s what he wants to see. Eunhyuk knew this and knew he was never going to get anywhere with him, so that’s why he sent him to Yunho……..and I am shutting up now.

I have no idea if Korea has any place like that, for some reason I doubt it…but who knows.

I can not thank you enough for your awesome comments they always make me smile like an idiot and I read them over and over. I can’t believe they are for TFAN. You don’t have to worry about me pulling out a fairy tale ending, I promise.
Re: xD update!
Omfg this was so good *O*
I really loved the how Yunho talked to Kyu even though Kyu wouldn't listen, Bad Kyu! xDD somehow this chapter reminds me of the Explorers of the Human body episode, where DBSK were guests and they were testing jumping or something like that. And CHANGMIN!!! *O* Love his personality in this chapter! He's so adorable being all protective, like in the ehb episode, when he kept winning for DBSK xD Okay, nuff spazzing....

My favourite line in this chapter xD "Kyuhyun just smiled back at him, “It totally was. Let me tell you all about it. There is an older model that Zhou Mi knows with a very talented tongue…”" lmaooooo, and it's so fresh in my mind (since I've been rereading the chapters, lol, and sungmin told kyu's mom and all!) Lol, Kyu is such a brat.
I just love this story. You are an awesomesauce author <3!

TFAN hwaiting!

Oh and about the Korea situation, yeah, I don't think the fans and the nation will be really accepting if there was indeed real kyuwook. I would support them totally but u-u Korea is still stuck in it's semi-evolving state. The fanservice, they'll put up with but the reality of it will cause chaos e.e Also I think Korea just got past like the law that they had that homosexuality was consensual rape O_O, so I don't see them really accepting an actual situation in the near future. Which sucks :< Why can't everywhere be like some parts of america?(Like my country ._. where it's illegal to be gay)
“Did you hurt somebody, Hyung?” Kyuhyun asked suddenly moving closer to the other man.

“More people than I could ever name. I shall always regret hurting them, but I also made other people proud. Life isn’t simple Kyuhyun, it is hard…it’s so very hard. Sometimes there is not a right choice, sometimes you just have to make the choice that causes the least harm, but in the end somebody always gets hurt.”


I totally can relate with this line of urs. this story of urs makes me realize what I should try to consider doing in my real life..like making the right decision but never wanting too..this chappie made me crying now..T_T..

Not that I'm the same..hahaha..but reality and truth hurts.. what u want to have the most is also something u can't have..damn really hurts..T_T

I'm just like Kyu..wanting to think that the truth won't hurt. pretending I could be happy if I try to be selfish..T_T
Isn't it always that way? What you want most is so often unattainable.

Who is to say you are wrong? I really do believe that in some situations there are not right choices. *turns off Yunho mode*

Blah, I haven't completely woke up yet.

Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
Oh my. I think my vocabulary ran out of words.

“Now, how are you going to feel when Ryeowook does that? When he is arm in arm with a girl and can be openly affectionate…with somebody who isn’t you, because it can never be you?”

THIS. i don't know. i love this. i love this whole chapter. in fact i love all the chapters.

i think it's already useless to tell you this because i already did even before telling you, but i'm memming everything XD
I'm barely awake so forgive me if this is a really stupid question, but what is memming?

Thank you so much for reading and commenting.