Sweet Deception, Chapter Eighteen

Title: Sweet Deception, Chapter Eighteen
Author: Aquariuslover
Pairings: WooGyu
Rating: R
Genre: Angst, Romance, drama
Length: Chaptered
Beta: tahoeturquoise


Summary: For years a fire has been smoldering deep inside of WooHyun, and now it is burning out of control and wrecking havoc on the group. A danger is looming over SungGyu, but will he pay it heed before it claims his life? Can an ominous deal be brokered in time to save Infinite?

Author’s Note: Hey, if you want to help decide which short story I write next vote here.

Chapter List




SungGyu had not fallen back to sleep.

Once WooHyun was perfectly sound asleep he had slid out of bed and showered. He had then returned to bed not bothering with clothes.

They had made love earlier…SungGyu cringed involuntarily; even using the words in the privacy of his own mind caused him almost physical discomfort. He had been intimate with WooHyun in a way he had never allowed himself to be intimate with anyone else, both mentally and physically. The unprotected sex had been extremely stupid, but at the time he couldn’t stop himself…the desire to be spontaneous and reckless had been too strong. The need to be…be unlike himself had won out.

Sex was something he had had countless times; he had had sex with WooHyun also…but at times, with WooHyun it was different and to call it sex would be to devalue it…minimize it. SungGyu believed there was no place for such words as love in his life, but making love was the only description that fit what he and WooHyun had shared at times; but he knew he would never…could never admit such a thing aloud.

Love was a word for other people…people who lacked his goals and determination. He had an unrelenting drive to succeed and so many of his dreams had yet to come true. Love was a complication…a complication he wouldn’t willingly embrace and there was more…he secretly doubted if he was even capable of the emotion. He could love his members…but to be in love with someone. To SungGyu, being in love with someone meant totally surrendering yourself to that person…giving that person total power over you. SungGyu saw nothing romantic about such a notion…in fact he feared it.

He had been foolish to think his attraction to WooHyun had been about surrendering his control…he now knew he had always been in control. Even while being tied up and begging for more…he had never lost control. WooHyun could manipulate and deceive him, but he now understood he was always in control. He chose to forgive WooHyun…he chose to need WooHyun. It had always been his choice.

He knew all of this as he watched the other man sleeping, and yet the certainty of what he must do next still stung. It was his choice, but still he regretted it. The time for blissful, mindless sleep had passed. Four nights he had spent with WooHyun and this, their fourth morning together, was the end of their mindless dalliance. The time for thinking…the time for consequences, had come.

SungGyu watched as WooHyun’s eyes slowly opened, alerting him that the other man was awake. SungGyu had always been amazed at how wonderfully WooHyun’s eyes reflected his happiness…his perfect smile.

“What are you thinking about so seriously?”

“You weren’t asleep?”

“I was but I could hear you thinking,” WooHyun told him as he stretched out in the bed.

“So you know what I need to say; this is a great relief.”

WooHyun sat up in bed and reached for the leopard scarf they had discarded earlier. “You are thinking it would be a shame if we didn’t use this once more before we left. Who knows when we will ever get another chance.”

“We had sex all night long.”

“But I know how much you like being tied up, and we didn’t use it the last time,” WooHyun told SungGyu as he gently pushed the other man over onto his back, reached for his arms and started to tie the scarf around his wrists.

“No,” SungGyu told the younger man, sliding his arms away before WooHyun tightened the knot. “It was perfect before, I don’t need this. I am good.”

WooHyun beamed. “Perfect?”

“Yes,” SungGyu agreed, giving WooHyun something of what the other man needed. A crumb, as WooHyun referred to it. “We are enough, tying me up is just—”

“Your kink,” WooHyun told his lover. “Your kink that I happen to enjoy…a lot, but you are right it was perfect before…shall we find perfection again?”

SungGyu let out an almost painful moan as WooHyun’s warm, inviting lips found his. WooHyun was so warm. SungGyu embraced the warmth knowing soon WooHyun would withdraw it from him. His hands roamed over the lean, muscular body that he had found so much pleasure in. The body he had surrendered to. He knew he would soon be longing for WooHyun’s body and his flawless kiss.

With a reluctant heart SungGyu broke from the kiss and said in a voice belonging to a leader and not a lover. “It’s time for talking now, WooHyun.”

“I’d rather do other things,” WooHyun replied, searching for the kiss that had ended too abruptly.

“No,’ SungGyu said firmly, and he felt WooHyun tense. “It’s time we settle a few things.”

WooHyun rolled away from him. “What do you mean?”

“I have avoided thinking, but we need to get this settled before we return home.”

“Settle what?” WooHyun asked, alarmed. “You sound like we are making a business arrangement.”

“I just want to set some ground rules.”

“Ground rules?” WooHyun sat up, his anxiety increasing by the second. “No, I don’t like the sound of this at all. We are in relationship, not a business arrangement.”

“And there it is,” SungGyu whispered as he sat up on the side of the bed, knowing exactly what his next sentence would cost the other man.

“There what is?”

“We are not in a relationship…I don’t do relationships,” SungGyu said softly. “You know this. I have told you repeatedly.”

“I beg your pardon?” WooHyun asked and SungGyu could hear the hurt in his voice.

“You know how I am.”

“I know you’re emotionally dysfunctional, but you don’t have to be with me. We can be together…I understand you.”

“Dysfunctional?”

WooHyun got off the bed and started to pace the hotel room. “You know what I meant.”

“No, I don’t; clarify it for me.”

“You…you make things harder than they need to be,” WooHyun told the older man as he stopped pacing and slipped on his pants. “You make everything so hard.”

“No,” SungGyu corrected. “I am making this super easy. You are the one that will persist in making it harder than it needs to be.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you are the one that will insist on the unnecessary complications.”

WooHyun scratched the back of his neck. “Okay, tell me how you are going to make this super easy.”

SungGyu straightened his shoulders and explained, “We are free to see whoever we want to see,” SungGyu stated matter-of-factly. After seeing WooHyun’s whole expression darken he quickly added, “That includes each other. I don’t want to stop this aspect of our relationship. I rather enjoy it.”

WooHyun just glared.

“I have never been in a monogamous relationship!” SungGyu exclaimed, feeling the other man’s anger aimed at him. “It’s not personal!”

WooHyun continued to glare.

“I know if you had your way we would call each other boyfriend, hold hands all the time and go around skipping merrily, but that isn’t me!” SungGyu declared defensively. “You know me! That isn’t me at all!”

“So let me get this straight,” WooHyun said coldly. “You want to continue to have sex with me whenever you desire, but you also want to have sex with anybody else you might find attractive.”

“Quit glaring at me,” SungGyu ordered as he got off the bed. “When you say it like that…it sounds awful.”

“Because it is awful!”

“It’s not! WooHyun, have you never heard the famous saying about Vegas?”

WooHyun grabbed for a shirt. “I don’t think I’m going to like this Vegas saying, but why don’t you tell me anyway.”

“What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.”

“So you are done with me completely…I guess I misunderstood what you were saying. Silly, stupid me!”

SungGyu reached out, grabbed WooHyun by the arms and pulled him closer. “No, I meant…we will never get these four days back. They were amazing and I will never forget them, but we have been living in a dream world…and we are about to return to the real world. I like being with you, so much. You know I do. I don’t want to stop being with you, but I never promised to be with you only.”

WooHyun’s chest heaved. He tried to control the storm of raging emotions that were threatening to consume him, so he could properly communicate with the other man.

SungGyu winced seeing the pain the other man was in. “I can’t promise that I will never want to be with a woman again…I can’t promise that. If I did…I’d be lying.”

WooHyun clenched the shirt he was holding and unleashed his emotions. He shouted at the other man, “Don’t you see that is a lie? You don’t want to be with anyone but me you…you stupid idiot!”

“Don’t yell at me!” SungGyu barked back at him. “They say the walls are sound proof but I hardly doubt they could suppress the sound of you screaming.”

“So what if they hear us. MyungSoo and SungJong have the rooms next to yours! They have kept my secret for years…they would keep ours, too.”

“Stop it.”

“We don’t have to hide from them. They love us!”

“I am not hiding! I am trying to explain to you that I am still me! I might have had sex with you…but I am still me. It doesn’t cancel out who I was before….before you blackmailed me.”

WooHyun took a step back as if he had been punched in the gut. “So this is my punishment? Your way of saying I didn’t put one over on you?”

“No, that isn’t it. I just have to be me!”

“Who else would you be?”

“Somebody you want me to be!”

“I want you to be honest with yourself! I want you to embrace the love I have for you.”

“I do embrace it, but it doesn’t change who I am!”

“And just who do you think you are?”

“I am a person…who enjoys being with you, but I don’t want to be with you exclusively! I am a man that still finds women attractive!”

“Wrong answer,” WooHyun informed him as he slid his shirt on. “That is who you think you are. That isn’t who you are.”

“You are starting to piss me off,” SungGyu warned as he scrambled to find his own clothes. “It isn’t like I am saying I don’t want to be with you. It isn’t like I am saying this has to stop.”

“No, you are just saying you want me to share you, but I won’t! You are mine!”

“Excuse me, but I am not your property. I do not belong to you or any person, and if I ever gave you that impression let me set you straight real fast!”

“I didn’t—”

“Yes, you did mean it like that. You need to keep those possessive thoughts out of your head or this will be way more over than either one of us want it to be. I am not your property and I never will be.”

“I love you.”

“So what? I do not belong to you! Just because you love me does not mean you own me! Just because I let you stick your dick in me does not mean you own me! I am my own person. You have never controlled me, and if you thought you did—then you were gravely mistaken!”

“I never thought that!”

“I can have sex with who I chose to have sex with and so can you!”

WooHyun, who had been about to put on his shoes, tossed them both at SungGyu instead, and bellowed, “I don’t want to have sex with other people! I am in love with you!”

“That doesn’t mean you can’t have sex with other people!”

WooHyun just stared at SungGyu aghast.

“It doesn’t,” SungGyu said in his defense. “I wouldn’t hold it against you.”

“How very kind and understanding of you!”

“You are such a girl!”

“Apparently, I am! I am just like all the girls you used in the past. I thought I would never feel sorry for them…Boy, was I wrong. I feel sorry for every girl that ever gave their heart to you!”

“Stop it!”

“Did you toss their hearts away as callously as you have tossed mine away?”

“I did not toss anything away! Your heart is still pounding in your chest! My past lovers knew what they were getting into…like you should have known!” SungGyu said through clenched teeth.

WooHyun walked up to SungGyu and put his hand over the other man’s heart. “Do you feel your heart pounding? It is pounding for me…just like mine that you so hatefully rejected pounds only for you. Can you understand what I am saying…can you feel it?”

SungGyu looked away from him. “Can you please stop being so melodramatic and be reasonable for a moment? I have given you as much as I can. More than I have ever given anyone else…why can’t you be happy?”

“I have all your heart…but your crippled psyche will only give me crumbs of your love.”

“Stop it! I have forgiven—”

“Yes! I know! You have forgiven me things you would never forgive anyone else for!” WooHyun shouted. He then reached up and with his hands he turned SungGyu’s face so they were looking at each other. “Do you know why? Why you have forgiven me so much? Why you have given more of yourself to me than anyone else? Can you even acknowledge why?”

SungGyu clamped his mouth shut.

“Because you love me as much as I love you…you always have, but there is something in you that can not admit it.”

“No…it isn’t like that.”

“Yes, it is like that. I had to blackmail you into having sex with me…or we would have never even got this chance at love.”

“You didn’t know!” SungGyu responded, stepping back out of the other man’s hold. “You didn’t know it would end up like this! I know you didn’t! If you had known…if you had known you would have done something sooner.”

WooHyun shook his head. “There was always a little thread of hope. I never admitted it to anyone, not Key and not to myself, but it was always there.”

“Liar.”

“When I came to your bedside and you just welcomed me back with open arms…do you remember how freely you gave me your love then?”

SungGyu turned his back on WooHyun. “That was because I thought…I thought we were just friends…I didn’t know how you felt about me.”

“You love me…you probably loved me all along, but your love is hidden so very deeply inside you. There is a black veil inside your mind…that prevents you from seeing so many things…wonderful things. In the past, I, who knows you best, couldn’t see past it, but I do now. I see past it and I know you love me. I can’t give you the easy way out…not again.”

“Easy!” SungGyu screeched, swinging himself back around to face the other man. “You have never made anything easy for me.”

“Oh, yes I have. I have made many things easy for you! You just don’t see it.”

SungGyu turned red and he spat, “When you treated me like the dirt beneath your feet for months? When you stressed me out to the point where I almost died? Were you making it easy for me then?”

WooHyun paled. “No, not then…but I was convinced you could never love me back. I was wrong.”

“I almost died!”

“Because you missed me! Because you need me! Because you love me!”

“Because you were my friend! My most trusted friend and you turned your back on me…no, you did worse! You acted like you hated me!”

“Yes, I did act that way. I know I hurt you, and I am so sorry. I know I did wrong, but don’t you see, if it was just friendship it wouldn’t have hurt you so badly. It was love…it was always love…I just couldn’t see it. Now, I see it and I won’t settle for anything less.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I will not share you with a bunch of whores.”

SungGyu groaned. “WooHyun, they are not whores!”

“Yes, they are!”

“Do I get jealous of you and Key? No, I do not. I am sure you have called him and informed him of every intimate detail that has passed between us!”

“I have not!” WooHyun denied. “I never even admitted to him that we had sex.”

“But he knew you blackmailed me…didn’t he?”

“I have to talk to somebody and he can’t tell anybody. I have as much on him as he has on me.”

SungGyu let out a weak laugh. “What a lovely basis for a friendship you two share.”

WooHyun stepped forward. “The only relationship I care about right now is the one I have with you.”

“As long as you do not demand an exclusive relationship with me…as long as you do not start flaunting our relationship to the members…there is no reason it has to stop.”

“I am sure you don’t see any reason for it to stop.”

“I don’t.”

“You would miss me,” WooHyun said as he stepped closer to SungGyu and draped his arms around the other man’s neck.

“Yes, I would miss you,” SungGyu admitted, maintaining eye contact with WooHyun. “I don’t want to miss you.”

WooHyun leaned in and instead of going for a kiss he whispered in the other man’s ear, “Get ready to miss me.”

“What?”

“You heard me,” WooHyun said as he bent over and grabbed the shoes he had thrown at SungGyu earlier. “I love you and I know I always will. I don’t want to be with anybody but you.”

SungGyu fidgeted as if WooHyun’s words caused him physical distress. “You don’t have to keep saying those things.”

“I do have to keep saying them. I hope to someday teach you how to say them.”

SungGyu scoffed, “Never.”

WooHyun slid his shoes on and stated firmly, “Then we will never be together again.”

“WooHyun…don’t be like this.”

“Oh, I am being like this. You don’t have to tell me you love me…because you are right, I am being a little girly for wanting to hear that so badly, but like I said, I won’t share you.”

“I can’t be monogamous.”

“You better learn how to be if you want to be with me again. It’s up to you to make the next move.”

SungGyu looked confused.

WooHyun pointed his finger at SungGyu and explained, “But don’t you dare make a move on me…unless you are ready to be with me and only me! Do you understand me? I will not share you.”

“You are being ridiculous,” SungGyu spat, while rubbing his forehead. “It’s not like I am going to run and jump in bed with the next woman I see.”

“I am sure you won’t,” WooHyun said with confidence. “But you won’t be running and jumping in bed with me either—until you are willing to make a commitment.”

“A commitment!” SungGyu gasped as if the word horrified him.

WooHyun groaned and whirled around. “Yes, a commitment to be with me and only me.”

“I won’t do it.”

“Then congratulations, you will have ruined both of our lives.”

“Good grief! You are such a drama queen!”

“I am not asking the impossible! I am not even being unreasonable,” WooHyun told SungGyu as he headed for the door once again. “I am just demanding what any normal person demands in a relationship.”

“Just remember these are your rules,” SungGyu warned the departing man. “This is your doing.”

“No,” WooHyun said in a voice filled with sadness. “This is your weakness. I know you can’t help it. I know you have been this way for a long time…but if I don’t put my foot down…you will just break my heart more than you already have later on.”

SungGyu tilted his head. “Are you crying?”

“No, I am not crying!” WooHyun snapped and opened the door, hating that his eyes were filling with tears. “I’m pissed!”

“You just said I can’t help it,” SungGyu reminded him.

“You had better learn to help it!” WooHyun brusquely instructed as he shut the door behind him, leaving SungGyu alone.
  • Current Mood: cold cold
  • Current Music: Little Lies by Fleetwood Mac
Owh wow. That was some major change of mood there. I never thought it'll be this way. I kept expecting someone to fling over something huge throughout the argument. Lol.

And yay first ^^,

Edited at 2013-11-24 04:07 pm (UTC)
calmed down a bit
Okay, I get that Gyu has serious commitment issues but he needs to swallow them. I still hadn't really forgiven Woohyun for the blackmail but now I am sympathising with him. Gyu is emotionally stunted and is scared of everything falling apart if he gets into a fully-committed-deeply-in-love relationship with Woohyun (kinda reminds me of how Woohyun acted in Bed of Roses - except he was denying he was even gay).

Woohyun was right to give him that ultimation but at the same time I fear that with Sunggyu's deadly pride they are both going to suffer bucket loads before something actually happens. My guess - Sungyeol or another member or maybe even Key gives him a kick up the backside.

Anyway, you always get me so emotionally and then leave me hanging. Waiting oh-so-impatiently for the next chapter!
Oh woohyun..its okay.../cuddles

I know Sunggyu can't change straight away but maybe soon he'll see...
ahh it's a breathtaking moment. like those 4 days happiness is not happening at all. :( sad sad
Go angry woohyun, go! Make sunggyu miss you like crazy, let him beg for his crumb now.
Go Baby!!!!
Woohyun is right, he isn't asking for something impossible and it isn't unreasonable... dumbass sunggyu.
OMG it will be so hard to wait an other week! Thank you for your amazing work again :) I don't want to see the end because Woogyu is my weakness and we didn't see many wonderful work about them like you do! Sunggyu will realise his feelings soon for sure and Woohyun's reaction is absolutely understandable! They will be together at the end and all the members will be happy for them ( I've just made my own conclusion haha)
Good luck for your next projects! I will be watching them carefully ♥
omo! i like this chapter so much. so intense.
eventually some guy here will finally learn to use his heart more than his head.

so far i think woohyun deserves some love in this chapter :D
OMG. OMG. OMG. This...I'm speachless. You have really, really surprised me with this.
So this was it all along. This was SungGyu's 'weekness' as WooHyun very wisely put it?
He is afraid of commitment? Afraid of giving up all control over his mind and heart? Of the feeling of belonging to someone? He's afraid of love?
I understand what you said in your reply to my last comment, Aquarius, and I totally agree. Our SungGyu is all brains. lol

Oh, WooHyun. The pain. I feel you, bb. And I'm proud of you. Everything he told SungGyu
was so absolutly true. It is amazing to see just how much he can see through SungGyu.
He is a master on the subject. The fact he's been observing, studying, loving the man for all those years has paid off in the end. He has him totally figured out. And he is making his way through with the security that gives to know the ground he's standing on, all the time. He plays with a considerable advantage, and hopefully this will be his and SungGyus salvation in the end ;))
omg I loved every word he spat to SungGyu. I even cheered out load to some of it. And it is past 3 in the morning here. He rendered me speechless. Oh the raw emotions! I looove it hahaha

Aishh Im already missing this so..
Ugh, my heart...I should have waited another chapter ;~~~~; But I suppose this isn't as bad as Sunggyu nearly dying. It's a fairly normal fight, something that needed to be cleared up...yes I think I can handle this, but it doesn't mean I won't be on the edge of my seat waiting to know what happens next!
I wonder what happened in SungGyu's life that made him so scared of commitment... sad.

Thanks for the update!
...I am so angry at Woohyun right now it's not even funny. How dare he demand such things from Sunggyu when he put himself in this predicament. Sure Sunggyu has commitment issues, but FORCING him into a relationship that he did not want to start in the first place is barbaric. The way I see it, Gyu would have been better off letting Hyun leave when he wanted to end his contract. Hyun was stupid to think that by blackmailing Gyu the first time would make him change. Sure he's curious but that doesn't mean he will change his personality lickity split just to accommodate what Hyun wants him to be =.="

Whatever happened to their friendship will never be the same again (unrequited love and all that aside) and it will be Woohyun who is to blame for the fallout.
Stupid gyu.....thanks for the update! I think gyu is gonna have a inner battle soon.....Mind vs heart..... Ambition vs love......kyaaaa